I think suffering can bring us closer together as we "mourn with those that mourn." We learn the Christ-like attribute of Charity or maybe it's not so much that we learn it, but it is bestowed upon us as we extend those feelings of empathy. I have watched people do two things in the trial of loosing a spouse.
- They either pull inward and feel sorry for themselves, thinking their lot is harder than everyone else's
- They look outward and realize that everyone eventually suffers and that suffering helps us to grow.
The ones that pull inward wallow in their sorrow, while the ones that look outward escape it. Now I don't expect anyone to be perfect. We all have our wallowing moments, but when we recognize we are wallowing it's time to make yourself look outward because that is the only way out and forward.