Friday, August 30, 2013

A great example to me

A Great Example to Me

Aug 30, 2013
One of my really good friends just moved away today . Feeling kind of sad, but I wanted to share why she and her family touched my life so much. Rachel and her family moved to Springfield just a few months before Scott died. She's about 10 years younger than me with 3 little kids (oldest just started kindergarten). Not a family that I would have ever thought would take an interest in me. Despite the differences in our families, after Scott died she began texting to just check on me. She noticed at church when I was struggling and invited us for dinner right after ( no small task considering that I have 3 teenage boys that eat a lot and that it might be uncomfortable without me having a husband.). They just didn't care about the any of that, she just dropped everything and made it work, not just once, but over and over again. Like most young couples they were not a family of a lot of means, but that didnt stop them either. She had my daughter babysit and my son watch their dogs. Her husband took an interest in my boys. They were heaven sent especially for us. How blessed I feel to have such a special friend who loved us so unconditionally. That is the gospel in action. I told my kids after prayers this morning to remember their example and to carry on that legacy when they are young married couples. Look for people in need and reach out, don't be so busy that you don't have time to see them or do something about it. Thanks Rachel for a wonderful lesson!

Thursday, August 22, 2013

In the Depths of the sea aug 22, 2013

In the Depths

Aug 22, 2013

I wanted to share what we talked about in our family devotional this morning before I head out to pitch mulch. (My new career now a days). I find patterns in scripture stories that relate directly to my life.

I wish this would have been emphasized to me as a youth. This is the scripture that prompted our discussion...

24 For behold, ye shall be as a whale in the midst of the sea; for the mountain waves shall dash upon you. Nevertheless, I will bring you up again out of the depths of the sea; for the winds have gone forth out of my mouth, and also the rains and the floods have I sent forth.

25 And behold, I prepare you against these things; for ye cannot cross this great deep save I prepare you against the waves of the sea, and the winds which have gone forth, and the floods which shall come. Therefore what will ye that I should prepare for you that ye may have light when ye are swallowed up in the depths of sea? - 
Book of Mormon: Ether 2:24-25

This passage hit me in a new way today. I stopped reading and I said to my children,

Life is like this... 

We are going to be dashed by big waves
and buried in the depths of the sea of trials and tribulations, 

but do not loose hope because 
the Lord has promised that he will bring us up through those trials
 if we will turn to Him,
 for He is in control of the wind and the rains.

Wednesday, August 14, 2013

Good Things to Come

Good Things to Come

August 14, 2013

Sometimes we keep walking the same road over and over again and we find ourselves wondering... 

When will this ever end? 

How many times must I go through this?

In those moments when faith wavers we have to keep putting one foot in front of the other and turn to The Lord. The quicker we can turn to Him and away from our frustrations and sorrow and self pity, the quicker the help will come. I have found that over and over again.  

The help always comes when we choose the light over the darkness

Not help, as in the trial is taken away.. because some trials simply can not be taken away, but help to bear the trial.  

I have felt the arms of unseen angels holding me up, helping me push my handcart up insurmountable hills. Those burdens can be made light, but only if we are willing to turn to the Savior and willing to devote all our strength to Him.  He cannot carry us if we give up, but he can aid us to keep taking those steps. I bear witness of that.  

Look to the light,
                 choose hope,
 and keep pressing forward 

because in the strength of The Lord you can accomplish all things

I watched this clip a couple of months ago, but it's been good to remind myself again.

Monday, August 12, 2013

Persevering through the hard times for the reward in store- aug 12

Persevering through the Hard Times for the Reward in Store

Aug 12, 2013

As I look back on my life I see patterns that have help prepare me for this...  

The Lord  never just shoves me cold turkey into a situation. He makes sure I have the skills and experiences to help me handle them. Here is a story from my past that draws an interesting parallels...

Prior to Christmas and New Years of 1999, my husband had just completed his first year of residency and had earned his credential enabling him to moonlight (pick up extra shifts in small town ER's on the weekends and holidays). We really wanted to get away, just the two of us on a cruise, but the only way we could afford to do that was if he picked up extra moonlighting shifts over Christmas. We had 3 boys- ages 4, 3 and 6 months. We decided to have Christmas early, and then for me to go to our parents' homes over the holidays while he worked.  

He planned to do a 96 hour shift,
take 12 hours off to sleep and 
then do a 120 hour shift. 

It was totally insane, but the hospitals had agreed to pay him double over the holidays so we decided that it would be worth it in the end.

I don't know who had it worse....

Driving 6 hours with 3 little kids was no picnic, neither was explaining to them why they had no presents while everyone else was opening them Christmas morning. New Years Eve I found myself putting kids to bed by myself while everyone else went to parties. I had though I would have help with family around, but as it turned out all of my single siblings had much more fun things to do than hang out with 3 toddlers. My boys were very busy and destructive, and it was a frustrating week trying to take care of them in a non-toddler proof home.  After that week I swore I would never go on 'vacation' again by myself, deciding that staying home would have been much easier. 

Scott has been so busy all week that we had hardly had a chance to talk.  He was only able to sneak an hour or two a night of sleep, normally broken up in 30 min segments.  

He was exhausted. 

We both were, but we were so glad to be reunited! 

With kids to bed, we collapsed ourselves. He turned to me and said,

 "We did it! We made it through! I'm so glad that is over, but now I get to have you all to myself for a whole week." 
I said, "Was it worth it?
He said, "You're always worth it." 

As I remembered this story this morning, my eyes were opened to the similarities with my life now...

  • He's off moonlighting and I'm taking care of the kids trying to make this normal for them in a not so normal situation. 
  • We don't get to talk that much, but we had a plan before hand and we are both working our hardest to make it successful. 
  • Sometimes it's no picnic. It's lonely, and I miss him by my side at the parties. 
  • There are lots of things we are both missing out on, but there is an end goal in sight. 
  • A reward at the end of the tunnel. 

I know there will be a happy reunion at the other end. I will run into his arms (hopefully not exhausted anymore) and ask, 
"Was it worth it?" 
 And he will reply, "To be with you for eternity? How could it not be." 

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

Patience with Growth - Aug 6 ,2013

Patience with growth

Aug 6, 2013

I had an issue pop up again with one of my children that I thought we had overcome and resolved. I was feeling very frustrated with him and with my abilities as a parent to enact a change in him. I wanted to share this scripture I came across in my reading tonight and how it came as an answer to a prayer for how to deal with him.

I was reading in D&C 9:12 Where the Lord was telling Oliver Cowry that because he had not taken the proper steps and put forth the proper effort that the time for him to help with the translation has passed. At the end of the verse, he is telling him that it is okay that he failed and that he had made up the difference by giving Joseph extra strength to translate. 

The last part says...."and neither of you have I condemned." As I pondered this, I thought,

"How patient, the Lord is with us. Even when we fail in our tasks and disappoint him. He never gives up on us. He gives us chance after chance, and tailors new experiences for us to teach us what he wants us to learn. "

I have been annotating each verse I read in my scripture study and I find that writing while I study allows the spirit to more easily teach me. This is what I wrote...

"The Lord forgives us for our weaknesses. He is patient with us even when we grow and change slower that He expects. We need to do that for others, especially for our children. We need to realize that we all take a different amount of time to get there. It is not a race, but it is the steady forward course that matters. Be more patient!"

I am so grateful for my scriptures and that the spirit can speak to me and teach me how to be a better parent.

Monday, August 5, 2013

Thoughts on Gratitude and parenting aug 5, 2013

Thoughts on Gratitude and Parenting

Aug 5, 2012

I need to do a better job of recording the things I'm grateful for in my journal... 

I've been keeping a separate list, and I've been doing a much better job in my prayers, but I think I should also include things I'm grateful for in my letters to my missionary son in Chile and in my journal entries. Today the Lord held back the rain so we could do the work we needed to on the path.  I had two good helpers to help me get the work done. (R and E). I am grateful for the opportunities to work side-by-side with my children. I thought today of R as a mother, and how she will have much more confidence to take care of things in her yard and home because of her experience working with me. I thought of E and how he is looking stronger, and how working is helping him to become a man. We do not have a idle time.  It is good to work hard and be sore and exhausted at the end of today. I read that same sentiment in my husband's missionary journal today. How alike we are! The two of us together were always quite a team. He would say that. I guess we still are.

Sometimes I worry about the future for my kids. I worry about their mistakes, I worry about them falling away from God,  I worry about them not being able to provide for their families. I need to have faith that a Lord will help them find the way. As a parent you want to protect your children, and you want everything to turn out perfect for them. But I guess if their life was perfect, they wouldn't learn very much. They have to have life experiences that will teach them the things that they need to learn to become the people God wants them to become. In the end that's all that really matters. This life isn't about having the perfect experience. It's about going through a lot of hard stuff that teaches you a lot of hard lessons- yet learning to find joy in the journey of it all.  Now isn't that the biggest challenge of all? 

Now more gratitude. I'm grateful that these people are coming to see our house. I will probably be more grateful if it all works out, but even if it doesn't, I will find things to be grateful for. It was the motivation to get the path fixed for spring. It gave me hope that there are people out there still looking. It helped me to see that I can move into a rental for the rest of the year.  It also gave me some experience in dealing with realtors. I will be smarter next time.  I am really grateful for all the opportunities I have to share spiritual insights through social media. It's a way I can feel the  spirit and feel like I'm contributing everyday. I don't feel so selfish about my personal study. It's a chance to put my candle on the hill instead of under a bushel. I'm grateful for the awesome experience I'm  having with my scripture study. I'm getting so much out of journaling every verse. I'm so excited for my time to sit down with the scriptures and to see what I'm going to learn. I want to be able to understand everything right now and just get all the inspiration I can get, but I know the Lord has to give us line upon line and give us time to act and internalizes those principles. My impatience shows through. I'm grateful for Monday gymnastic lessons, because I get to walk for an hour and dictate my journal or listen to a conference talk. I love time to walk alone and think especially when I can talk out loud. I can talk to Scott sometimes and I feel like we are going out to walk together. I'm grateful for the little impressions the Lord gives me about my future, and has always given me. It's good for me to have time to think it out and prepare and plan before hand. I can be more steady when the actual situation happens.