Gratitude journal - march 21, 2013

My 1:00- 3:00 Epiphany...

March 21, 2013

My 1:00- 3:00 am epiphany...

I woke up and couldn't go back to sleep so I felt impressed to start a...

gratitude journal. 

I have been praying lately that 'I would see the hand of The Lord in my life each day' and this idea  answered that prayers. 

I'm finding ways to be grateful for things that I previously felt were curses. For example, last night I wrote,

"I'm grateful that I had an MRI of my knee and went to physical therapy the month before Scott died when we still had insurance because now I know the exercises to do to help it." 

(Previously I was upset that God wasn't letting me run pain free when I felt like I at least deserved that after all of this tragedy). 


My house selling has been a huge stress in my life, and I have struggled being patient with the time it is taking to sell it. Today I wrote... 

"I'm grateful my house hasn't sold yet because it has given me the time to slowly say goodbye, to sell things, organize and purge things, and to be able to focus on my kids instead of moving."

Gratitude is a way of looking at things.

As my dear husband used to say... 

"It's impossible to be grateful and depressed at the same time." 

  

One of my favorite speaker talked about Gratitude.  He said...

"We can choose to be grateful, no matter what.

This type of gratitude transcends whatever is happening around us. It surpasses disappointment, discouragement, and despair. It blooms just as beautifully in the icy landscape of winter as it does in the pleasant warmth of summer.

When we are grateful to God in our circumstances, 

we can experience gentle peace in the midst of tribulation. 

In grief, we can still lift up our hearts in praise. In pain, we can glory in Christ’s Atonement. In the cold of bitter sorrow, we can experience the closeness and warmth of heaven’s embrace.

We sometimes think that being grateful is what we do after our problems are solved, but how terribly shortsighted that is. 

How much of life do we miss by waiting to see the rainbow before thanking God that there is rain?

Being grateful in times of distress does not mean that we are pleased with our circumstances. It does mean that through the eyes of faith we look beyond our present-day challenges."

-Grateful in Any Circumstances BY PRESIDENT DIETER F. UCHTDORF

Journal march 20, 2013: Service

Journal entry: March 20, 2013 (4 months out)

I am learning that at the end of the day

the number of people I have helped is 

more important than the number of 

things I have accomplished on my to do list. 

Stop, 

take time to look around and 

find someone to lift today. 

It will lift you.

Prayer works march 4, 2013

Prayer Works

March 4, 2013 (4 months out)

Hard morning... My sister came and listened to me cry and then helped me do laundry, pack cookbooks and made us dinner. Sold our truck! Hurray! Opened the book my dear aunt sent me and wanted to share this quote... I know many of you are not of my faith, but I want to comment on this scripture from the New Testament.

 Prayer works... It really does! 

It is the only thing that consistently gets me through everyday. 

Sometimes it takes really hard times like these to dig deep enough and to need strong enough that you are willing to devote the time to earnest prayer and earnest listening. 

God is willing to help us if we only ask.

 "If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not:and it shall be given him" (James 1:5)

"The message of James 1:5 is that God is approachable, generous, and willing to answer our prayers.  An additional implication is that if we don't ask of God, He won't give liberally.  Later in the epistle, James writes, 

'Ye have not, because ye ask not" (James 4:2). "  

"In the same spirit, Elder Jeffrey R Holland taught, " God is anxiously waiting for the chance to answer your prayers and fulfill your dreams, just as He always has.  But He can't if you don't pray, and He can't if you don't dream.  In short, He can't if you don't believe" (Broken Things to Mend {Salt Lake CIty: Deseret Book, 2008].85)"                                                        - John Bytheway

March 6, 2013 

Something that comforted me tonight.... I was searching for scriptures on prayer. I have 172 to read. This one stood out...

2 Kings 20:5 Thus saith the Lord, the God of David thy father, I have heard thy prayer, I have seen thy tears: behold, I will heal thee:

Things that lifted my Burdens at 3 months out

Things that lifted my Burdens...

During the first 6 months I spent a lot of time studying, praying, and meditating.  I often turned to some of the messages put out by our church in the form of talks and these short videos.  This one particularly pertained to the death of a loved one and I felt connect to it and shared it on facebook.

Jan 29, 2013 

When a big trial hits you in your life, you have a choice where to turn. You can be angry and turn away from God into the darkness or you can turn toward him and into the light. This is real; the atonement of Jesus Christ has the power to make your burdens light if you turn to Him.

Lifting Burdens

Feb 5, 2013

Hope... Something we all need. A great pick me up after feeling a bit discouraged. A big thanks to my sisters who have been taking turns coming to help me. How sweet they are, and how I love my family. I would be lost without them. 2 birthdays in the next week. Alex is 18 and Rachel 11. Where has the time gone? 

 The Power of Hope

Feb 11, 2013

Yesterday was a poor me day. I just really missed Scott. The loneliness is hard. Listen to this today and thought- it could be so much worse. What an amazing young man. Sums up what I feel exactly!
 

We're Still a Family: Plan of Salvation 

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Adversity: Trials are part of the Journey- jan 13, 2013

Adversity: Trials are part of the Journey

I listen to a talk by one of the leaders of our church, Deiter F Utchdorf called.  Having grown up in Germany during WWII, he experienced many trials as result of the war and ensuing economic and political hardship. His words are words of wisdom.

"It is your reaction to adversity, not the adversity itself,  that determines how your life’s story will develop."

"If you ever feel your burden is too great to bear, lift your heart to your Heavenly Father, and He will uphold and bless you. He says to you, as He said to Joseph Smith, “[Your] adversity and [your] afflictions shall be but a small moment; and then, if [you] endure it well, God shall exalt [you] on high.” "

"Enduring adversity is not the only thing you must do to experience a happy life. Let me repeat: how you react to adversity and temptation is a critical factor in whether or not you arrive at your own “happily ever after.”

Things to help you get through trials

•  Learn to laugh
• Seek for the eternal perspective
• Principle of compensation- 
• the faithful need to know that every tear today will be repaid 100 fold. 
• The Lord will compensate you for every difficulty- see JOB.
•  Put your trust in the Savior and draw near to Him 
• He will come to our aid. 
• He will make weak things become strong. 

"Without trials we don't understand the joy of the triumph."

"We can't pick our trials but we can choose how we will face them."

Walter D Wintle
If you think you are beaten, you are
If you think you dare not, you don't,
If you like to win, but you think you can't
It is almost certain you won't.

If you think you'll lose, you're lost
For out of the world we find,
Success begins with a fellow's will
It's all in the state of mind.

If you think you are outclassed, you are
You've got to think high to rise,
You've got to be sure of yourself before
You can ever win a prize.

Life's battles don't always go
To the stronger or faster man,
But soon or late the man who wins
Is the man WHO THINKS HE CAN!"

"Our hard times can be times of greatest growth."

"We experience hard things so we will have greater understanding and compassion towards others."

Your Happily Ever After DIETER F. UCHTDORF

How does the story of a young man building a ship relate to being a widow?

How does the story of a young man building a ship relate to being a widow?

The scriptures have an amazing ability to answer the questions that 

I have about my life and to give me direction.

 
A story that I have read a thousand times can speak to me differently if...

I approach it in prayer,
with a question in mind,
and with paper and pencil to write down the thoughts that come while I read.  

This morning I was reviewing my scripture study notes from January 13, 2013.  I read in the Book of Mormon about the young man, Nephi, being directed to build a ship to aid his family in crossing the Atlantic ocean to the promise land.  

I wanted to share what I learned from this story only two months after my husband died...  

I was troubled by this immense burden.

I felt overwhelmed at the task at hand.
 
I wanted to know all of the answers of where my life was headed now.
 

These were the things that weighed on my mind as 

I sat down to study this morning and 

these are the answers that came.  

Below the lessons I learned I am including the chapter as reference, especially for my readers who are unfamiliar with the Book of Mormon.  My thoughts are in parenthesis and italics. I encourage you to read the account in conjunction with my notes.  My hope is that you will be able to see how studying the scriptures in this way can open up the windows of heaven to you.

1. Through this scripture story the Lord was trying to teach me... 

• If I would have faith in him and keep the commandments that he would help me get through this.  
• Even though I didn't feel equipped to handle this,   He would provide me with extra strength and abilities.  
• He was not going to just remove it for me, but He would help me.  
• When we don't have the ability to do something and yet after turning to Him we find miraculously to do what we thought was impossible, then our faith in Him is strengthened.  
• We learn things we could not learn except in the midst of a trial. 

2. I was reminded that the Lord had been preparing me to face this trial.  

• As that thought entered my mind, I began to look for and then see those experiences that had prepared me.  Those thoughts have continued to come as tender mercies over the months since then.  Each piece further testifies to me that the Lord is so mindful of me individually.  
• But if I had not specifically looked for and asked to notice those things, I would have glossed over their importance and the lessons the Lord had to teach me from them.

3. The Lord was not going to tell me what to do right away or all at once. 

• He teaches us one thing at a time, giving us time to digest and implement that knowledge into our lives. 
• I had to be willing to act on the knowledge I received and I had to do it right away.  
• If I was not diligent in my actions I found that the lines of communication halted.  
• In order to receive more instruction I had to prove trustworthy with prior direction.

4. I needed to stop complaining.  I needed a can do attitude.

5. The Lord can be a light ahead of me if I will look to Him through prayer, the scriptures, and the words of his holy prophets.

I am grateful for the scriptures and the things that Lord daily teaches me through them.  They give me hope, strength and courage to face the vicissitudes of life.

EXAMPLE: SCRIPTURE REFERENCE AND MY NOTES

Chapter 17

Nephi is commanded to build a ship—His brethren oppose him—He exhorts them by recounting the history of God’s dealings with Israel—Nephi is filled with the power of God—His brethren are forbidden to touch him, lest they wither as a dried reed. About 592–591 B.C.

 1 And it came to pass that we did again take our journey in the wilderness; and we did travel nearly eastward from that timeforth. And we did travel and ^awade through much affliction in thewilderness; and our ^bwomen did bear children in the wilderness.

 2 And so great were the ^ablessings of the Lord upon us, thatwhile we did live upon ^braw ^cmeat in the wilderness, our women did give plenty of suck for their children, and were strong, yea, even like unto the men; and they began to bear their journeyings without murmurings.

 3 And thus we see that the commandments of God must be fulfilled. And if it so be that the children of men keep the commandments of God he doth nourish them, and ^astrengthenthem, and provide means whereby they can accomplish the thing which he has commanded them; wherefore, he did ^bprovide means for us while we did sojourn in the wilderness.

(If we have faith and keep the commandment we will be given strength beyond our own to deal with trials- God doesn't remove them, but he helps us get through them.)

4 And we did sojourn for the space of many years, yea, even eight years in the wilderness.

 5 And we did come to the land which we called ^aBountiful,because of its much fruit and also wild honey; and all these things were prepared of the Lord that we might not perish. And we beheld the sea, which we called Irreantum, which, being interpreted, is many waters.

(In difficult times The Lord prepares help for us so we don't perish. He wants us to be happy and have joy. He wants to comfort us. We have to look for those small but tender mercies he gives us and recognize and acknowledge them.)

6 And it came to pass that we did pitch our tents by the seashore;and notwithstanding we had suffered many ^aafflictions and muchdifficulty, yea, even so much that we cannot write them all, wewere exceedingly rejoiced when we came to the seashore; and wecalled the place Bountiful, because of its much fruit.

 7 And it came to pass that after I, Nephi, had been in the land ofBountiful for the space of many days, the voice of the Lord cameunto me, saying: ^aArise, and get thee into the mountain. And itcame to pass that I arose and went up into the mountain, andcried unto the Lord.

(The Lord didn't tell Nephi everything to do at first. He asked him to do one simple thing.  Because Nephi obeyed more revelation was forthcoming. The extent that the spirit will teach us depends on our willingness to act on the small And simple promptings.)

8 And it came to pass that the Lord spake unto me, saying: Thou shalt ^aconstruct a ship, after the ^bmanner which I shall show thee,that I may carry thy people across these waters.

 9 And I said: Lord, whither shall I go that I may find ore tomolten, that I may make ^atools to construct the ship after the manner which thou hast shown unto me?

 (Notice Nephi doesn't complain to The Lord, "How am I going to do that? I've never done that before." He has a can do attitude.) 

10 And it came to pass that the Lord told me whither I should goto find ore, that I might make tools.

 11 And it came to pass that I, Nephi, did make a bellowswherewith to ^ablow the fire, of the skins of beasts; and after I had made a bellows, that I might have wherewith to blow the fire, I did smite two stones together that I might make fire.

 12 For the Lord had not hitherto suffered that we should make much fire, as we journeyed in the wilderness; for he said: I willmake thy food become sweet, that ye ^acook it not;

 13 And I will also be your ^alight in the wilderness; and I willprepare the way before you, if it so be that ye shall keep my commandments; wherefore, inasmuch as ye shall keep my commandments ye shall be led towards the ^bpromised land; and ye shall ^cknow that it is by me that ye are led.

(This is a type for all of our lives. If we will let him, The Lord can be the light and lead each of us through the wilderness if life here to the promise of eternal life.)

14 Yea, and the Lord said also that: After ye have arrived in the promised land, ye shall ^aknow that I, the Lord, am ^bGod; and thatI, the Lord, did ^cdeliver you from destruction; yea, that I did bring you out of the land of Jerusalem.

 15 Wherefore, I, Nephi, did strive to keep the ^acommandments ofthe Lord, and I did ^bexhort my brethren to faithfulness and diligence.

https://www.lds.org/scriptures/bofm/1-ne/17?lang=eng&cid=email-shared